DON'T FALL IN!
Hi all,
The weekend was a busy one for me, a friend got married on saturday. The church service took place in an orthodox church. It took forever - choruses spanned through almost 2 hours after a 30 minute prayer time. As soon as i spotted the bride and groom, i went outside the church auditorium to congratulate them, hung around for a few more minutes and zapped! I headed straight for carol rehearsal/end of year party for my choir - it went well and lasted till about 7pm.
On my way home, my mind flashed back to the happenings of the day as i remembered the bride's wedding gown, it was simply lovely, she definitely must have bought it from one of the big bridal houses in town. Then i remembered how lovely my dress looked on me when i got married. I thought, Oh God, the dress is hanging idly in a box,same with my native engagement attire as well as my husband's. It cost us some money and the most painful part of this is that, none of those clothes has been worn after the ceremonies, was it not a waste? I am an advocate of looking good in quality costumes, so if i were to make those same decisions again, they wouldn't change much. I'm disciplined as well when it comes to spending. But i really think there must be a way around having huge wedding expenses in this part of the world. What do you think?
My heart goes out particularly to young men who are under tremendous pressure to drop huge amounts of money in the name of wedding expenses, this is not to say you should be tightfisted, but have an agreed budget with your fiancee and stick to it.From experience, i think the wedding rings should take a high priority,don't compromise the quality, it will save you the money you will need to get a replacement 1-2 years down the line if you buy cheap, low quality ones. Meanwhile, it's about the only accessory that will remain in use for years after the wedding. As for the others, you could work around a moderate budget; afterall, people forget about most of those things that cost one an arm and a leg.
So keep the expenses slim, same with this xmas season; so many people spend so much that they're dead broke all through January. You really don't need to find yourself in this trap. Planning and wise spending pay off. Give, but do things reasonably.
About Me
- ODODO
- 'Tope is the 2nd of three children, Qualified pharmacist presently practising HR, Project Leader, 180degrees, musically talented, events manager, cute eyes, wife, mother.
10 comments:
You are so right,more should be invested into what will still be in use after the wedding. Spent so much on my dress and its lying in a box :(
when the demands from his inlaws are so high, and she seems to be the flashy type too, what's a guy to do.
God help us...
@biola.com
Thanks, Biola, once you know the 'nature'of your wife-to-be, nothing should surprise you, it just means you will have to work miles ahead of your contemporaries so you can drop money as soon as demands show up if she's the flashy type.For in-laws, it's advisable to be able to handle them from the start so that you're not under too much pressure. Don't stress yourself too much in the name of wanting to give and maintain a good impression.
You wanna know more? Pay man....
All the best
Funmi, thanks for your comment.I feel you. I'd suggest we open a bridal house rental outfit, get gowns from ladies in our shoes, before you know what's up, we'll be in money :-)))
@ Ododo, that's a good business idea and it will be good if you can follow it up.
Interesting post.
Ododo,
You have touched at a topic that so irritates me about weddings in general, not just in our part of the world….
If people will put as much effort in there marriages after the wedding day, I could maybe understand.
Celebrating the exchange of the marriage vows is what the wedding is all about..
Cut you coat according to your size is a saying I grew up hearing….I don’t think others are hearing that, Where everyone is keeping up with the “Jones”.
I hope the next generation are not bamboozled by there parents or pear pressure to do more than themselves.
I have see a lot of our people wedding were more than half of the people there the bride and groom don’t know and will never meet again, only for the couple to start there marriage life in debt.
I beg my sis’ tell them o! Maybe they will here….
Ore, i feel you o! Just like i really desired a small garden wedding, but for where?! . . You can imagine my parents were against it cos they claim people would would think i was already pregnant!!!! Can you imagine?!. So of cause i had the usual ceremonial serenren!
Intrestng post!
Wahala igbeyawo po!(please translate)
Every body is up and about the wedding,marriage nko? How will the youung couple live after the ceremony?
vanity upon vanity all is vanity...vanity
- during courtship she wants the best phone, she wants to wear gold just to show off to her friends
- while preparing for marriage they must choose gele and aso ebi and this considered more important than wedding gifts
i need not pay for tutorial, i do not have a problem alond that line, i was only asking on behalf of those who do.
doyin is a very different (undestanding) breed
Thanks so much omohemi for your comment. Yes o! tell them o! It could be really bad for some newly wedded couples, financially, i mean; and the interesting thing is that its every man for himself after the wedding, they even look forward to another opportunity to "come chop" at baby's naming, na wah jare!
Thanks Biola, it's great to know that your lady is very understanding and i trust you not to take things for granted, we ladies need some spoiling once in a while you know. As for demanding ladies, they almost always meet their match.
Hm, when i started out, i was adamant i wouldn't buy a wedding dress - i was going to rent one, but when i started searching, i found ugly, worn out gowns for rent at 25k and i saw a lovely one for sale at 40k. I'm told if i'd decided early to make one, i could have made a lovely one for 30k. So right now (less than 3wks to d-day) i'm buying a gown that i know will probably hang just like yours or be lucky to sell at one-third the cost price.
My fiance and I had planned for a small kinda wedding, but men! even after we told our folks how much we were planning for, the guest list has just blown outta proportion... The realities of Nigerian extravagance are hitting us in the face!
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