Tuesday, March 06, 2007

CHILD SUICIDE?!!

Hi People,

Hope you had a nice weekend. I had to rest on Sunday after a full week and a whole day in school on Saturday. Yes, my MMP programme is going on well.

I heard of an incident about 2 weeks ago and will like to share it with you and have your thoughts on it. A neighbour hitched a ride with me on a wednesday morning when he told me this: His wife, currently running her NYSC programme, works in a high class Nursery/Primary School in one of the choicest parts of Lagos; of course, the pupils are children of the very rich and the school runs an American curriculum (don't ask me for the name pls!)

One of the primary school pupils reportedly committed suicide because his friends and classmates had been consistently making fun of him about an obvious shortcoming he had, "what shortcoming? you might ask, the shortcoming was that his friends travelled to the UK for vacation that year and he didn't! It apparently had become unbearable for him, so he decided to put an end to his life since his parents didn't deem it proper to take him for vacation; he just couldn't handle the 'humiliation from his friends'. Can you imagine that?

I was dumbfounded for lack of a better word to describe how shocked i was at what i had just heard. I thought to myself; afterall, this particular action is the norm and typical of the system they emulate. I was really sad, i thought of the parents of the child, no action of theirs could have brought the boy back, they would have been full of regrets and deep, deep sorrow.


I already had a little background about the school that made me wonder how possible it is for discipline to be upheld within the system. There was no school uniform, everybody came to school in mofty; i heard recently that they have a uniform now; my neighbor even told me that his wife doesn't intend to work there after her NYSC because she said teachers were not well treated especially by the parents who feel they put food on their tables, they humiliate teachers who try to 'discipline' their children.

Westernization is good, early exposure for children is good; but shouldn't it be healthy for the children, especially on the long run? Is this not doing more harm than good? For a primary school child to go as far as taking his life is extremely scary and saddening for me. I heard of another school that does not hold lectures on Valentine's day, the whole school is heavily decorated with love colours and all students are compelled to bring and exchange gifts. I think instilling sound values into these children is the best thing we can do for them, when they're not properly trained, their values are weak and they become very vain, counting nothing as really valuable.

All said, i just want to close with this question: Do we leave the training of our children in the hands of a school whose value systems we're not totally proud of? I really need your comments on this.

Catch ya later, have a great week!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, if that is true, then it's a really shocking story. I went to a primary and secondary school in Naija were people like me who couldn't travel to the UK or US in the summer were in the minority, and yes, it put pressure on me. But to be fair, you choose how you respond to that kind of peer pressure, and I guess it was part of growing up !!

When I got to Ife, it was as if someone had flipped the script, I went from being the poorest person to one of the richest !! It was my earlier experiences that allowed me to be as 'humble' as possible, other people might say differently though !! (Ask you husband!). However, I made friends with everyone, and I mixed freely with all, which a lot of my friends from secondary school found astonishing !!

If you don't like the values being taught to your child, vote with your feet, and find another school. However, in most cases, the parents are at fault, if you look down on the teachers, in the end, they will habour resentment for you and your child, and in the end, no one wins.

ODODO said...

Boso,
Good to read from you! Thanks for stopping by and dropping a comment. I've actually being following up on you, it's good to note you're doing great.We've met a few times and i must say you're a very warm fella.

Peer pressure is normal, and is usually strongest at the adolescent stage, but this incident happened in a primary school o! Na wah.

Yes o, parents are mostly at fault. May God help us to train our children properly.

Anonymous said...

lol... ask your husband :) I like Boso, i'm biased... we might need to conduct a class poll for that one :)

I heard one other thing about the school that gives me worries... I heard they don't sing the Nigerian national anthem, but America's... and of course some America wannabe Nigerians put their children there...I'm sorry, I may be too patriotic, but I think thats crap and doesn't cut it.

When will Naija man keep his eyes on his area and not keep looking towards other mens vineyards?

Anonymous said...

American National Anthem in a Nigerian school? That's rubbish. Even in American International School (AIS), they sing both the Nigerian and American anthems.

It's really sad, people raising children with no idea of their identity. Again, if the parents know about it, and they're not doing anything, they're at fault !!

ODODO said...

Hmmm, thanks guys for your comments. It's really sad that parents are not only consenting to, but are cooperating with a system that rubs their children of their true identity. How will they ever be originals?

I think parents need to wake up and make the main things main and get real and deeper in their thinking.

Linkachild Admin said...

Hmm.. where does one start with this.
Its very sad to hear of a thing like thing. there is real not much to say that has not been said.

Bulling in the west as caused many a suicide stories...so that's not new.
but in the Nigerian environment that would be a total shock.

I personally dont believe you should totally leave the school to teach your child moral values.( no matter how good the school is) … they can be an aid and nothing else...parents are the first teachers on every level( so spend time with your children, especialy in the early years, what you teach your child in the first 5 years is what builds there character)
they encourage self esteem in a child so that in whatever environment the child finds him/her self they are not shaken.

if you are going to send your child to school in Africa and the school is being run like one in the UK or America...well expect to have the problems you get in the West!

Anonymous said...

This is a very sad story I am dumbfounded and don't know what to say. I have been thinking of sending my kids to naija and bring them back to London during their hols. I guess teaching your kids to be humble should be ones priority. An innocent child could easily make another child commit suicide just by bulling unknowingly. For me its not about how expensive a school is, its about what they can give my child in terms of education. I went to a strict school and I value the experiences and lesson I was taught. Lets teach our kids